18 Hilariously Embarrassing Masturbation Horror Stories That’ll Leave You Cringing

A reminder that you should always make sure that your door is locked.

“I was maybe 15 or so, and spending a week visiting my grandparents over summer break. I was in their office with my laptop and was doing the deed butt naked due to the A/C being broken that day. While in the heat of things my grandmother busts through the door to tell me that dinner is ready. I quickly tried to cover my junk/boner and nervously said I'd be out in a minute, while she just stood there staring. I guess she drew the conclusion that I was only naked because of the heat and apologized that it was so hot in the house, and that the repairman was going to be there shortly.

“To this day I'm still not sure if she kindly said that to avoid the obvious awkwardness, or if she genuinely thought I was so hot that I was actually just lounging around their house naked. Either way, that dinner was very awkward, and I learned that masturbation was best left for the bedroom and during times when you were safe from interruptions.” —ggk328

“I learned the hard way that licking Flamin' Hot Cheetos dust from your fingers does not clean them. Two hours and a bottle of wine later my vagina was on fire, and I'm pretty sure my vulva shudders to this day if Flamin' Hot Cheetos are present.” —amandas4d1002fba

CBS Films


View Entire List ›

Add Comment

*